Amma Cultist Friend

by Anne
(USA)

It wasn't until after I fell out with a friend that I realized her weird outbursts of angry, controlling behavior towards me were a symptom of her involvement with the local Amma organization and that she had been trying (unsuccessfully) to recruit me. I had been oblivious because I didn't think an intelligent, serious woman like my friend would get involved in a bona fide cult. I thought she was just inviting me to some events that I just wasn't interested in and didn't understand why she wasn't taking no for an answer.

Our relationship went nuclear when she started criticizing my own DIY religious practices and I replied that I followed the Zen motto, "If you meet the Buddha on the Way, kill him!" She immediately started lecturing me in a frantic way on how stupid and incapable I was in every aspect of my life. It was like a physical assault. I basically told her to get out of my life and stay out until and unless she was ready to apologize and never treat me like that again.

I have to thank the ex-Amma people who shared their experiences with me and helped me figure out why this was happening. I believe my friend was basically mirroring the abusive behavior she was experiencing firsthand with the Amma group. I feel very sorry for her. If she ever gets out of this, I'd like to be friends again.